I wish I were a kid again...
One of the great things about being a kid, a young kid, is that, in most cases, you're free to be exactly who you are. Good personality traits or bad, you hold nothing back. As you grow older, you begin to temper those traits to conform with what's acceptable. Sometimes it's a necessity - belting out every answer in math class as a show tune certainly isn't acceptable. And sometimes, it's our peers who decide what's 'cool' or not. We start to section off little pieces of ourselves and bury them, deep down inside our soul, so that we fit in. So that we look like we belong. So that we're normal.
What we don't realize is by doing that we're stunting the person we authentically are. We're taking our creativity and stuffing it into a pre-formed mold, hoping beyond hope that we can still reach the artistic pieces of ourselves on command. But the years go by and as adults, we're discouraged from being who we truly are by spouses and kids and jobs and life. And one day we look around and wonder, "How did I get here? Who is this person? This isn't me."
For decades, I tamped down the me I knew I was whenever something I did was met with disapproval, real or imagined. That's all it took to break any defiant streak I had. Disapproval and judgement. A scoff, a word, a look. I towed the line, rarely defying the confines of what was acceptable. But every once in a while, a spark would flare, and that person I remembered from childhood would shout loudly enough for me to hear. And I'd take a chance, risk the condemnation, and go for it. And I'd be happy.
I've reached the point in my life where I recognize the inner conflict I deal with on a continuous basis is rooted in the 'real me/me I have become' dichotomy. I don't like it anymore (not that I ever really did). I'm tired of being the person everyone else thinks I should be; the person everyone else expects me to be. The person I expect me to be.
So I'm letting go of the filaments that bind me. Tearing down the walls I've built. Digging deep to rescue the little girl who once viewed life in a completely different light than I do now. Because if I don't do this now, I'm afraid I never will. It won't be easy. It won't be something that I can do overnight, or in a day, or in a week, month, even a year. It took a long time for me to get where I am and it will take a fair amount to get me to where I want to be. But I'm determined to get there. Because I liked that girl I was. I liked her a lot.
The question is, will everyone else?
Wednesday, September 9, 2015
Tuesday, September 1, 2015
On a personal note...
If you've read any of my prior blog posts, you may have noticed a theme. This has not been the best year for me. I've been off my game, out of sorts, and waayy behind on my projects. My life has been a pain in the ass, figuratively speaking. More to the point, it's been a pain in the back. Literally.
It began in March of this year as just another backache, a little more severe than usual, lasting a couple of days longer than one of my typical backaches, but nothing I was too worried about. By April, the pain was constant, and building rapidly. Along came May and by then, I could barely walk. Time to see a chiropractor. I founda good the best one and started making weekly visits. While he helped return certain areas back to normal, there was little headway to be made on one particular spot. An X-ray later and the culprit was revealed. My scoliosis had twisted its way out of control.
What's scoliosis? you ask. It's a curvature of the spine that occurs more often in girls than in boys. (Google it if you don't believe me.) I was diagnosed with an 'S' curve when I was fourteen, and to be honest, except for a twinge now and then, I never gave it any thought. My mistake. For while I spent the past 34 years in happy ignorance over the state of my back, my spine was executing a great rendition of a geometric angle.
The chiropractor recommended I see an orthopedic surgeon, who in turn referred me to the Spine Clinic. It's never a good thing when you're referred to the 'Spine Clinic' (or maybe it is, there's no doubt what they specialize in.) More X-rays and the verdict is in. I get to have my spine straightened.
"We can rebuild her...we have the technology...we'll make her faster...stronger..." wait - that's The Bionic Man. Oh well, I'll settle for the extra inch of height that I'm likely to gain after the surgery. And less pain in my back.
So, the next few months aren't going to be fun ones for me. Due to the pain levels I'm dealing with at present, I've cancelled all remaining signings for this year. And since I have no idea how long it will take me to recover, it's not looking promising that I'll be signing anywhere next year, either. At least not in the first half of the year. But that's okay. I have my own event to plan - Pages in the Caves anyone? - and many, many books to write. Several that I know a few people are impatient to get their hands on.
In the meantime, I'll putter along, whistling a happy tune and trusting that all of this will turn out okay.
Later, dudes...
If you've read any of my prior blog posts, you may have noticed a theme. This has not been the best year for me. I've been off my game, out of sorts, and waayy behind on my projects. My life has been a pain in the ass, figuratively speaking. More to the point, it's been a pain in the back. Literally.
It began in March of this year as just another backache, a little more severe than usual, lasting a couple of days longer than one of my typical backaches, but nothing I was too worried about. By April, the pain was constant, and building rapidly. Along came May and by then, I could barely walk. Time to see a chiropractor. I found
What's scoliosis? you ask. It's a curvature of the spine that occurs more often in girls than in boys. (Google it if you don't believe me.) I was diagnosed with an 'S' curve when I was fourteen, and to be honest, except for a twinge now and then, I never gave it any thought. My mistake. For while I spent the past 34 years in happy ignorance over the state of my back, my spine was executing a great rendition of a geometric angle.
The chiropractor recommended I see an orthopedic surgeon, who in turn referred me to the Spine Clinic. It's never a good thing when you're referred to the 'Spine Clinic' (or maybe it is, there's no doubt what they specialize in.) More X-rays and the verdict is in. I get to have my spine straightened.
"We can rebuild her...we have the technology...we'll make her faster...stronger..." wait - that's The Bionic Man. Oh well, I'll settle for the extra inch of height that I'm likely to gain after the surgery. And less pain in my back.
So, the next few months aren't going to be fun ones for me. Due to the pain levels I'm dealing with at present, I've cancelled all remaining signings for this year. And since I have no idea how long it will take me to recover, it's not looking promising that I'll be signing anywhere next year, either. At least not in the first half of the year. But that's okay. I have my own event to plan - Pages in the Caves anyone? - and many, many books to write. Several that I know a few people are impatient to get their hands on.
In the meantime, I'll putter along, whistling a happy tune and trusting that all of this will turn out okay.
Later, dudes...
Wednesday, August 12, 2015
I'm taking the plunge...
I've decided to host an author event next fall. I've toyed with the idea on and off over the past year but I blame the hubs for talking me into it. (Little did he know what he's getting himself into.)
I hear a lot of talk amongst authors and readers alike that there aren't enough events being held in smaller towns. It seems that most events are held in bigger cities or at the beach, most likely to draw in a huge crowd because, let's face it, there's a larger population in urban areas. But readers in the smaller towns want to attend events, too. And they want something within driving distance. We all know that traveling expenses can add up, and if a reader (or author) can make it a day trip, it benefits everyone.
So I chose to have the event in Cave City, KY. Although it's a small town; I'd be surprised if many people outside of the locals have heard of it; it's centrally located between Louisville, KY and Nashville, TN. (Please don't MapQuest it...I'm making an estimate.) The convention center is just off of Interstate 65 and right up the road from a bunch of hotels and restaurants. There are plenty of family activities in the area - Dinosaur World, Jesse James Riding Staples, Kentucky Action Park (can you say "zipline"?), and more caves than you can count. Mammoth Cave National Park is only a few miles away, and if small town life starts getting on your nerves, Bowling Green, KY, home of the Corvette, is 25 minutes away.
But enough about the extracurricular activities...I'm planning to put on a kick-ass event!! I already have pages of notes that I add to daily as more and more ideas pop into my head. I almost wish that the event was this September (almost) because I can't wait for everyone to come. Am I building up my expectations? Damn straight, I am!! I think I might have a little bit of party planner flowing through my veins.
Anyway, if you're an author and you'd like to sign up to attend, you can fill out this form. If you're a reader who would like to meet the awesome authors who will be signing their books, keep an eye out here. I'll be posting ticket information in the near future. And everyone needs to mark their calendars for Saturday, September 24, 2016 for the Pages in the Caves Author Event.
Would a clown be too much?? Hmmm...where's my notebook?
I've decided to host an author event next fall. I've toyed with the idea on and off over the past year but I blame the hubs for talking me into it. (Little did he know what he's getting himself into.)
I hear a lot of talk amongst authors and readers alike that there aren't enough events being held in smaller towns. It seems that most events are held in bigger cities or at the beach, most likely to draw in a huge crowd because, let's face it, there's a larger population in urban areas. But readers in the smaller towns want to attend events, too. And they want something within driving distance. We all know that traveling expenses can add up, and if a reader (or author) can make it a day trip, it benefits everyone.
So I chose to have the event in Cave City, KY. Although it's a small town; I'd be surprised if many people outside of the locals have heard of it; it's centrally located between Louisville, KY and Nashville, TN. (Please don't MapQuest it...I'm making an estimate.) The convention center is just off of Interstate 65 and right up the road from a bunch of hotels and restaurants. There are plenty of family activities in the area - Dinosaur World, Jesse James Riding Staples, Kentucky Action Park (can you say "zipline"?), and more caves than you can count. Mammoth Cave National Park is only a few miles away, and if small town life starts getting on your nerves, Bowling Green, KY, home of the Corvette, is 25 minutes away.
But enough about the extracurricular activities...I'm planning to put on a kick-ass event!! I already have pages of notes that I add to daily as more and more ideas pop into my head. I almost wish that the event was this September (almost) because I can't wait for everyone to come. Am I building up my expectations? Damn straight, I am!! I think I might have a little bit of party planner flowing through my veins.
Anyway, if you're an author and you'd like to sign up to attend, you can fill out this form. If you're a reader who would like to meet the awesome authors who will be signing their books, keep an eye out here. I'll be posting ticket information in the near future. And everyone needs to mark their calendars for Saturday, September 24, 2016 for the Pages in the Caves Author Event.
Would a clown be too much?? Hmmm...where's my notebook?
Thursday, July 30, 2015
I've been doing a lot of thinking lately...
As I've mentioned a time or two in other posts, my mojo has been off this year. Not just off. Missing. Totally in hiding. Lying on a beach somewhere in a country that has no extradition. And I've been left here, fumbling around with my writing, trying to figure out how to get back on track. Then it occurred to me. I never left the track. It's still there. What I've done is throw up HUGE mental roadblocks. That's right. I said me. Mojo had nothing to do with it. (Technically, I said 'I', but proper grammar and all that.)
I'm a worrier. I try not to be. It's not a fun thing to be. I've read all the wisdom about "not borrowing trouble", "you can't predict the future", blah, blah, blah. It's in my nature. I'm a worrier. I prefer to think of it as being a realist - seeing exactly what's in front of me and going from there. But sometimes you need a little faith ~ hope ~ wishful thinking, whatever you want to call it; a little optimism that everything will work out. So that's what I'm working on. Relying a little more on chance than on fact.
I think there needs to be a balance, and I'll be the first to admit, I'm a bit top-heavy, or bottom-heavy, as the case may be. I let situations stop me before they occur because I can't see a way to make them work. And that's what I've done this year with my writing. Oh, the writing part still happens on a semi-daily basis. It's the production of the books that's slowing me down. There are factors that go into publishing a book, factors that I can't see beyond, and rather than take a deep breath and trust that they'll be there when I need them, I sputter and stall, wondering what the point is of having a completed book if I can't publish it at that moment. And it took me more than half a year to realize it, that I am the one slowing me down, stumbling over roadblocks that I put up. Slow learner here.
But at least I've realized it. Better late than never, right? More importantly, I can do something about it, knock down those roadblocks, or climb over them, or better yet, close my eyes and wish them away. Because that's all they are...invisible barriers that my mind created. And what my mind created, my mind can change, reshape, mold into opportunity instead of misfortune. Hey, I think I hear my mojo calling.
Nice tan!
As I've mentioned a time or two in other posts, my mojo has been off this year. Not just off. Missing. Totally in hiding. Lying on a beach somewhere in a country that has no extradition. And I've been left here, fumbling around with my writing, trying to figure out how to get back on track. Then it occurred to me. I never left the track. It's still there. What I've done is throw up HUGE mental roadblocks. That's right. I said me. Mojo had nothing to do with it. (Technically, I said 'I', but proper grammar and all that.)
I'm a worrier. I try not to be. It's not a fun thing to be. I've read all the wisdom about "not borrowing trouble", "you can't predict the future", blah, blah, blah. It's in my nature. I'm a worrier. I prefer to think of it as being a realist - seeing exactly what's in front of me and going from there. But sometimes you need a little faith ~ hope ~ wishful thinking, whatever you want to call it; a little optimism that everything will work out. So that's what I'm working on. Relying a little more on chance than on fact.
I think there needs to be a balance, and I'll be the first to admit, I'm a bit top-heavy, or bottom-heavy, as the case may be. I let situations stop me before they occur because I can't see a way to make them work. And that's what I've done this year with my writing. Oh, the writing part still happens on a semi-daily basis. It's the production of the books that's slowing me down. There are factors that go into publishing a book, factors that I can't see beyond, and rather than take a deep breath and trust that they'll be there when I need them, I sputter and stall, wondering what the point is of having a completed book if I can't publish it at that moment. And it took me more than half a year to realize it, that I am the one slowing me down, stumbling over roadblocks that I put up. Slow learner here.
But at least I've realized it. Better late than never, right? More importantly, I can do something about it, knock down those roadblocks, or climb over them, or better yet, close my eyes and wish them away. Because that's all they are...invisible barriers that my mind created. And what my mind created, my mind can change, reshape, mold into opportunity instead of misfortune. Hey, I think I hear my mojo calling.
Nice tan!
Saturday, July 25, 2015
Today I begin my 49th year on this earth...
Yes, I'm one of those people who counts my birthday as the end of the year of my age. Huh? Did I confuse you? What I mean is, though I turn 48 today, it is because I've completed 48 years of life. Kinda like high school, only different. Well, maybe not that different.
Anyway, though I am one year away from starting a new decade in my life, I'm not quite ready to give up on this one. Even though I can honestly say that I'm not as far along on my journey's path as I would like to be, each year does get better. Although I do wonder why my mind and my soul still feel like they're 20 but my body feels like it's 80. Hmmmm...gotta work on that one!
Most people make their resolutions for the upcoming year on January 1st. I make mine on my birthday. Not really resolutions, rather goals, both personal and professional. I can honestly say that I didn't meet many of mine that I set last year. Life got in the way and messed with my mojo.
But all that's in the past. Today is a new day...a fresh start. Today is the day I wipe the slate clean and start over. And the goals I've set for the upcoming year are lofty ones. I'm determined to be a better person, not only to others but to myself. There's no way in hell I'm heading into my 50s on a negative note.
So, Happy Birthday to me. Here's to many, many more!!!
Yes, I'm one of those people who counts my birthday as the end of the year of my age. Huh? Did I confuse you? What I mean is, though I turn 48 today, it is because I've completed 48 years of life. Kinda like high school, only different. Well, maybe not that different.
Anyway, though I am one year away from starting a new decade in my life, I'm not quite ready to give up on this one. Even though I can honestly say that I'm not as far along on my journey's path as I would like to be, each year does get better. Although I do wonder why my mind and my soul still feel like they're 20 but my body feels like it's 80. Hmmmm...gotta work on that one!
Most people make their resolutions for the upcoming year on January 1st. I make mine on my birthday. Not really resolutions, rather goals, both personal and professional. I can honestly say that I didn't meet many of mine that I set last year. Life got in the way and messed with my mojo.
But all that's in the past. Today is a new day...a fresh start. Today is the day I wipe the slate clean and start over. And the goals I've set for the upcoming year are lofty ones. I'm determined to be a better person, not only to others but to myself. There's no way in hell I'm heading into my 50s on a negative note.
So, Happy Birthday to me. Here's to many, many more!!!
Wednesday, July 8, 2015
I haven't written in a while...
Not my blog post, or a new manuscript, or anything I deem worthwhile. I've kind of been in a funk lately, and though I really don't like it, I'm not sure how to make it go away.
A year and a half ago, oh hell, my whole life, I've attempted to better myself, do SOMETHING that would bring about a catalyst for change. While there's nothing wrong with getting up in the morning, going to a nine-to-five job, coming home in the evening for dinner with the family, watching a couple of episodes of your favorite show, and then going to bed, only to repeat the next day, that has never been the life I wanted. That's not to say I haven't lived it. For decades I've lived it. But I always yearned for something else - something just out of reach. Maybe I don't know how to be contented with what I have. Could be. I wouldn't argue with anyone who suggested that. Or maybe I think - know - feel - that I can be something more. Have something more. I'm not talking about fame and fortune. Really, I'm not. Okay, maybe just a little fortune. I'm talking about a life that fulfills me. That eases the place in my soul that is never quite satisfied with how I'm getting along in life. Is it supposed to be this hard? Seriously??
So back to the funk. I see myself today in the same place I was a year and a half ago, before I began writing. Oh, there are miniscule changes. I've published books, met new people, made new friends. I've learned how to do things I never imagined doing and stepped out of my comfort zone on many occasions. But when I look at the big picture, I'm still standing in the same place. Day to day life hasn't changed. It hasn't gotten better or, thank god, worse. It just is. So it makes me wonder, is the effort worth it? Is all of the time and money and emotional upheaval worth being in the same place I was when I started? Would I be happier if I went back to that nine-to-five life, vegging out on the sofa in the evenings, watching TV? I know the answer even without anyone telling me. No. I wouldn't be. I wasn't happier then, so what makes me think I'd be happy going back to that? There's something in me, deep down in the furthest reaches that pushes me to challenge myself, challenge the nine-to-five way of life, do something different, creative. So I do.
In the meantime, I attempt not to give in to the lack of progression that I see. And before anyone jumps on me about it taking time, just keep going, blah, blah, blah, I'm not only referring to the book side of my life. I'm talking about me - the person. The whole person. Not only an author, or wife, or co-worker, or friend, or mother to my furry children. I'm talking about all of that plus the parts of me that only I know exist.
I was hoping that by writing this down, getting it 'off my chest', so to speak, I'd feel better. Writing usually helps. This time it didn't. But that's okay. I'm not quite ready to turn on a Netflix marathon just yet. I don't think. Now where did I put that remote?
Not my blog post, or a new manuscript, or anything I deem worthwhile. I've kind of been in a funk lately, and though I really don't like it, I'm not sure how to make it go away.
A year and a half ago, oh hell, my whole life, I've attempted to better myself, do SOMETHING that would bring about a catalyst for change. While there's nothing wrong with getting up in the morning, going to a nine-to-five job, coming home in the evening for dinner with the family, watching a couple of episodes of your favorite show, and then going to bed, only to repeat the next day, that has never been the life I wanted. That's not to say I haven't lived it. For decades I've lived it. But I always yearned for something else - something just out of reach. Maybe I don't know how to be contented with what I have. Could be. I wouldn't argue with anyone who suggested that. Or maybe I think - know - feel - that I can be something more. Have something more. I'm not talking about fame and fortune. Really, I'm not. Okay, maybe just a little fortune. I'm talking about a life that fulfills me. That eases the place in my soul that is never quite satisfied with how I'm getting along in life. Is it supposed to be this hard? Seriously??
So back to the funk. I see myself today in the same place I was a year and a half ago, before I began writing. Oh, there are miniscule changes. I've published books, met new people, made new friends. I've learned how to do things I never imagined doing and stepped out of my comfort zone on many occasions. But when I look at the big picture, I'm still standing in the same place. Day to day life hasn't changed. It hasn't gotten better or, thank god, worse. It just is. So it makes me wonder, is the effort worth it? Is all of the time and money and emotional upheaval worth being in the same place I was when I started? Would I be happier if I went back to that nine-to-five life, vegging out on the sofa in the evenings, watching TV? I know the answer even without anyone telling me. No. I wouldn't be. I wasn't happier then, so what makes me think I'd be happy going back to that? There's something in me, deep down in the furthest reaches that pushes me to challenge myself, challenge the nine-to-five way of life, do something different, creative. So I do.
In the meantime, I attempt not to give in to the lack of progression that I see. And before anyone jumps on me about it taking time, just keep going, blah, blah, blah, I'm not only referring to the book side of my life. I'm talking about me - the person. The whole person. Not only an author, or wife, or co-worker, or friend, or mother to my furry children. I'm talking about all of that plus the parts of me that only I know exist.
I was hoping that by writing this down, getting it 'off my chest', so to speak, I'd feel better. Writing usually helps. This time it didn't. But that's okay. I'm not quite ready to turn on a Netflix marathon just yet. I don't think. Now where did I put that remote?
Saturday, June 27, 2015
SEVEN NEW NOVELLAS!
By Dawn’s Early Light by Kristine Raymond
Monica Russo was more than ready to start a new life and leave her old one behind. The last thing she expected was for her car to break down in the small town of Celebration. Joe Callaghan has never quite recovered from his disastrous marriage. When he happens upon a woman stranded on the side of the road, it doesn’t take long for him to become enamored and when sparks fly, he knows he’s finally found the right woman. Once the fireworks fade, will their destinies be changed by dawn’s early light?
Ignite by Andrea Michelle
Playing with fire was sure to burn, but I couldn’t stop myself. I loved him into insanity. He left a gasoline trail across several states when he walked away from me to become a screenwriter, but I held the match that would ignite us both. Again. I’m Angel Solis and this is the story about how heartbreak, deception and betrayal can lead a person to insanity. I only hope that the madness will ignite a lifetime of love from the ashes left behind.
Moonlight and Music by Grace Augustine
Blake McIntyre was one of the most successful marketing representative in the music world. He'd built a great reputation and even taken a few artists to the top of the charts...that was until he was fired from a job he'd been at for fifteen years. Renee Manelli worked her way up the legal corporate ladder from receptionist to Chief Legal Assistant to the CEO of a prestigious law firm. One of her goals was to retire early and pursue her lifelong dream…her music. The journey that begins at 2 a.m. changes the lives of all involved. Anything’s possible When Sparks Fly.
Fireworks over Fairfield by Maryann Jordan
Welcome back to Fairfield, home of good friends and romance. Brock Sinclair retired from the military, living a solitary life, moved to Fairfield looking for his estranged daughter. Jean Roberts was a widow not looking for another love. When they meet, neither can resist the sparks between them. When an arsonist threatens the town and Jean, Brock will fight to save her. Along the way, both discover that love the second time around is just as sweet.
Something in the Mix by B. Maddox
Ivy Smith is trying to get her life back on track after a failed marriage. Everything in her life seems to be falling in place, especially now after a blast from her past reappears. However, someone else has other plans for Ivy and has been watching her every move. When Drew Evans waltzes into her life again, sparks start flying and her stalker starts making his presence known. Can Drew keep Ivy safe while figuring out who is stalking her and is there something in the mix for the two of them?
Patriotic Rodeo by J.M. Nash
Kennedy’s life would never be the same after the horrific night when her husband was brutally taken from her. She kept her heart protected and vowed to never love again, until a bull rider appeared in town. Tucker. One touch was all it took from him. Kennedy felt the fireworks start and knew that her life would forever be changed. Was she ready to let go of the past and move on or would Tucker end up a distant memory…
Fly Boy by Anne L. Parks
A weekend fling in Tahoe turns into something more for Jordyn and Grant. When tragedy strikes, Grant is left wondering what happened to the girl who stole his heart over the 4th of July weekend. When the two meet again the next 4th of July – sparks fly. Will Grant be able to let go of his pain and let Jordyn back into his life?
BUY LINKS:
WHEN SPARKS FLY
Amazon - U.S. - http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B010CHDXH2
CA - http://www.amazon.ca/gp/product/B010CHDXH2
AU - http://www.amazon.com.au/gp/product/B010CHDXH2
UK - http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B010CHDXH2
Barnes & Noble – http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/when-sparks-fly…/1056107799…
Kobo - https://store.kobobooks.com/en-US/ebook/when-sparks-fly-6
Google Play - https://play.google.com/…/details/Kristine_Raymond_When_Spa…
All Romance Ebooks - https://www.allromanceebooks.com/product-whensparksfly-1840…
iBooks - https://itunes.apple.com/…/bo…/when-sparks-fly/id1012083717…
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